Becoming a Bridezilla can instantly turn any dream wedding into a nightmare. Not only will your memories be tainted, but your relationships with your family and guests will be strained – if not ruined – as well. Fortunately, there are some simple steps you can take to avoid turning into a Bridezilla. The sooner you start paying attention to these tips, the better off you’ll be.
But even if you’re already seeing some early signs of the Bridezilla syndrome taking effect, don’t worry – there’s still time to reverse them.
10 Tips to Avoid Being a Bridezilla
With that said, let’s take a look at these ten precautions you should take to prevent – or reverse – the Bridezilla syndrome.
1. Sharing your vision with others
A great way to avoid taking the weight of the world on your shoulders is to make sure a few people in your inner circle understand exactly what you’re envisioning for your wedding. Your fiancée, your mom, your sisters and your best friends should all know exactly what you are picturing, this way they can help others make the decisions you would make, taking some of the pressure of you.
2. Be careful who you solicit advice from
When it comes to events like weddings, it seems like everyone has some advice. From what caterers to use to where to get your dress from – it can get overwhelming. Unfortunately, this can be a slippery slope into Bridezilla-hood since it can easily turn into frustration. So, if you’re not planning on taking advice from someone, don’t ask them – don’t even give them the opportunity. Be polite and graceful when declining, but firmly state you have that covered. Keep in mind, they mean well.
3. Don’t text or email if you can help it
Yes, we know this sounds odd, but technology has made miscommunications happen at a higher rate. Short texts or emails often come across as demanding instead of a quick relayed thought. Stick to phone calls, Skype and face-to-face meetings, especially when you’re talking about bigger concepts and plans. You want them to see and hear your tone and body language. Whenever possible, do everything in person – it will make the occasion more memorable in the end as well.
4. Keep your expectations grounded in reality
Weddings don’t come with some magical spells on them which eliminate life’s problems. People are going to be late to dinners, cancel on RSVPs, miss functions and get stuck in traffic. You can’t change the happenings in life, but you can control how you react to them. Hope for the best but expect the worst and then smile like it’s your wedding day – it is!
5. Don’t demand things, ask for them
It’s easy to start to get carried away as you become overwhelmed with plans and anticipation for the big day. The more things go wrong, the more rushed things will seem. This leads to a tendency to demand things instead of asking for them. Try to keep in mind that this is your wedding so not everyone is going to see it as big of a day as you do. They just aren’t that emotionally invested – how could they be? Ask for favors and let other people help you – we’re sure they want to. It’s all in the way you ask. Tell them you’re overwhelmed and how much you appreciate their help. And then say thanks!
6. Don’t obsess about details
A good sign to tell if you’re doing this is if someone asks, “What’s new?” and you launch into a spiel about the seating arrangement, the wine choices and every other detail of the wedding. If this happens, you’re probably too close to the situation and focusing on the details too much to actually enjoy your wedding. Take a time out and realize that even though this day is super important to you, if you’re so caught up in the details, you’re going to miss out on your own wedding!
7. Keep your attitude in check
It’s really easy to let your attitude get away from you, but keep in mind that you’re the bride. You don’t want people remembering your wedding as the time you turned into a beast. As such, be the type of bride who laughs at things, rolling with the punches and enjoying her wedding. Set the tone with a great attitude and people around you will reciprocate. If you’re miserable, everyone else is going to be miserable as well. We know you don’t want to hear that, but you’re the center of attention. If you want people to help you be happy, help them help you by being happy first.
8. Make your actual marriage more important than the wedding
Weddings last a day, marriages last forever. Keep in mind that all of this crazy nonsense will be over shortly and you have to spend the rest of your life with your fiancée, friends, relatives and in-laws. Nothing that happens during the planning of your wedding is worth getting worked up about; this is just the beginning of your life. The last thing you want to do is burn bridges that you’ll have to pass over for the next few decades of your life. To avoid the stress of the planning, have some date nights where there is a no-wedding-talk policy in effect.
9. Pick your battles wisely
If you expect to have a perfect wedding where everyone dresses and acts exactly how you want them to, stop watching movies and television shows. Things are going to happen. Your bridesmaid is going to hook up with your ex. Your mom is going to insist that her shoes don’t clash with her hat – yes, she’s going to wear a hat. Pick your battles wisely and only choose to fight the ones that are most important. The rest are just minor details that no one will remember in a few months – and if they do, you’ll all laugh about them!
10. Listen to your vendors
When you hire wedding professionals, keep in mind that they do this for a living. Listen to their advice and respect their opinions. Oftentimes, they are spot on and will help you avoid things that you haven’t anticipated.